Common Myths about Domestic Violence
A friend's perspective 
Why should I get involved in her problem--isn't it just a family matter?
Domestic violence is not just a family problem, it is a crime. 
It can't really be that bad.
Domestic violence is that bad. It is the single most common source of injury to women, more common than automobile accidents, muggings, and rape by a stranger combined. It increases in severity and frequency over time. It is estimated that over 2 million American women are beaten in their homes each year. It is a crime. 
That doesn't happen in my neighborhood.
Domestic violence occurs among all races, ages, religions and socio-economic levels. No state, no city, no community and no neighborhood is immune. 
She must be provoking him.
She is a victim and is not to blame. No one deserves to be beaten. The abuser chooses to abuse her to maintain power and control in the relationship. 
If it's so bad, why doesn't she just leave?
Any relationship can be difficult to end. She may be financially dependent or have limited job skills. Religious, cultural or family pressures may keep her in the marriage. She may have tried to leave and he stopped her; he may have threatened to take the children from her, or harm her more if she leaves him. Over 75 percent of women are killed after they leave an abusive partner. 
I know him--he seems like a nice guy.
Many abusers are not violent in other relationships. They even can appear 'charming' to outsiders. However, this does not indicate the kind of person he is behind closed doors. Believe her. 
He has a drinking problem. May be if he just got help for it, he'd stop abusing her.
Alcohol and drug use many intensify violent behavior, but it does not cause battering. Men are abusive with and without alcohol and drugs. Abusers want all the power and control in the relationship and that is their motivation; not the substances they use or abuse. 
If she wanted my help, she'd ask for it.
Your friend may not feel comfortable revealing her situation to you. She may be embarrassed or humiliated. 
She seems distant. I don't know if we're still friends.
Women in violent homes are often isolated from friends and family by their abusers. The abuser wants total control and does not want her talking to others. It is important to continue to reach out to her, and let her know you care.